[CS-FSLUG] Selling Bibles

EnzoAeneas enzoaeneas at gmail.com
Mon Mar 9 19:30:01 CDT 2009

You know. I have stuttered all of my life (quite badly sometimes) and I have
to say I laughed hard when I read that punch line. I have to say that the
Lord has given me the blessing to teach children at our church and I have
found that when I preaching the Word of GOD, I rarely have any trouble at
God bless (and good joke!)


On Mon, Mar 9, 2009 at 8:15 PM, Fred A. Miller <fmiller at lightlink.com>wrote:

> Selling Bibles
> While checking the church storeroom, the pastor discovered several cases of
> new Bibles that never had been opened and distributed. So at his Sunday
> sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the congregation who would be
> willing to sell the Bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise money for the
> church. Jack, Paul, and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the
> task.
> The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned their living as salesmen and
> were
> likely capable of selling some Bibles. But he had serious doubts about
> Louie,
> a local farmer who always had kept to himself because he was embarrassed by
> his speech impediment. Poor Louie stuttered badly. But because he didn't
> want
> to discourage Louie, the minister decided to let him try anyway.
> He sent the three of them away with the backseats of their cars stacked
> with
> Bibles. He asked them to meet with him and report the results of their
> efforts the following Sunday.
> Anxious to find out how successful they were, the minister immediately
> asked
> Jack, "Well, Jack, how did you make out selling our Bibles last week?"
> Proudly handing the reverend an envelope, Jack replied, "Using my sales
> prowess, I was able to sell 20 Bibles, and here's the $200 I collected on
> behalf of the church."
> "Fine job, Jack!" the minister said, vigorously shaking his hand.. "You are
> indeed a fine salesman and the church is indebted to you."
> Turning to Paul, he said, "And Paul, how many Bibles did you sell for the
> church last week?"
> Paul, smiling and sticking out his chest, confidently replied, "I am a
> professional salesman. I sold 28 Bibles on behalf of the church, and here's
> the $280 I collected."
> The minister responded, "That's absolutely splendid, Paul. You are truly a
> professional salesman and the church is also indebted to you."
> Apprehensively, the minister turned to Louie and said, "And Louie, did you
> manage to sell any Bibles last week?" Louie silently offered the minister a
> large envelope. The minister opened it and counted the contents. "Louie,
> there's $3,200 in here! Are you suggesting that you sold 320 Bibles for the
> church, door-to-door, in just one week?" Louie just nodded.
> "That's impossible!" both Jack and Paul said in unison. "We are
> professional
> salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many Bibles as we could."
> "Yes, this does seem unlikely," the minister agreed. "I think you'd better
> explain how you managed to accomplish this, Louie."
> Louie shrugged. "I-I-I re-re-re-really do-do-do-don't kn-kn-kn-know
> f-f-f-for
> sh-sh-sh-sure," he stammered. "A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-s-said
> wa-wa-wa-was 'W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you l-l-l-like t-t-t-to b-b-b-buy
> th-th-th-this b-b-b-Bible f-f-f-for t-t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks o-o-o-or
> wo-wo-wo-would yo-yo-yo-you j-j-j-just l-l-l-like m-m-m-me t-t-t-to
> st-st-st-stand h-h-h-here and r-r-r-read it t-t-t-to y-y-y-you?'"
> --
> "The fundamental premise of liberalism is the moral and
> rational incapacity of the American people." ~ Fred Miller
> _______________________________________________
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