[CS-FSLUG] The Lord's Prayer -------------- with answers

[Ciaran Hamilton]

I just want to mention that if you want to see more like this, it comes
from a book called "If God Talked Out Loud" by Clyde Herring. Credit
where credit is due, and all that.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0805453253/

I think it did, anyway. It could have copied someone else, but I don't
think so. :D

 - Ciaran.

> Our Father Who Art In Heaven.
> Yes?
> Don't interrupt me. I'm praying.
> But -- you called ME!
> Called You? No, I didn't call You. I'm praying.
> Our Father who art in Heaven.
> There -- you did it again!
> Did what?
> Called ME. You said, "Our Father who art in Heaven" Well, here I
am.What's on 
> your mind?
> But I didn't mean anything by it. I was, you know, just saying my
prayers for 
> the day. I always say the Lord's Prayer. It makes me feel good, kind
of like 
> fulfilling a duty.
> Well, all right. Go on.
> Okay, Hallowed be Thy name 
> Hold it right there. What do you mean by that?
> By what?
> By "Hallowed be thy name"?
> It means, it means . good grief, I don't know what it means. How in
the world 
> should I know? It's just a part of the prayer. By the way, what does
it mean?
> It means honored, holy, wonderful.
> Hey, that makes sense. I never thought about what 'hallowed' meant
before. 
> Thanks.
> Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven.
> Do you really mean that?
> Sure, why not?
> What are you doing about it?
> Doing? Why, nothing, I guess. I just think it would be kind of neat if
You got 
> control, of everything down here like You have up there. We're kinda in a 
> mess down here you know.
> Yes. I know; but, have I got control of you?
> Well, I go to church.
> That isn't what I asked you. What about your bad temper? You've really
got a 
> problem there, you know. And then there's the way you spend your money
-- on 
> yourself. And what about the kind of books you read?
> Now hold on just a minute! Stop picking on me! I'm just as good as
some of the 
> rest of those people at church!
> Excuse ME. I thought you were praying for my will to be done. If that
is to 
> happen, it will have to start with the ones who are praying for it.
Like you 
> -- for example.
> Oh, all right. I guess I do have some hang-ups. Now that You mention
it, I 
> could probably name some others.
> So could I.
> I haven't thought about it very much until now, but I really would
like to cut 
> out some of those things. I would like to, you know, be really free.
> Good. Now we're getting somewhere. We'll work together -- You and ME. I'm 
> proud of You.
> Look, Lord, if You don't mind, I need to finish up here. This is
taking a lot 
> longer than it usually does. Give us this day, our daily bread.
> You need to cut out the bread. You're overweight as it is.
> H ey, wait a minute! What is this? Here I was doing my religious duty,
and all 
> of a sudden You break in and remind me of all my hang-ups.
> Praying is a dangerous thing. You just might get what you ask for.
Remember, 
> you called ME -- and here I am. It's too late to stop now. Keep praying.  
> ( . . . pause . . . )Well, go on.
> I'm scared to.
> Scared? Of what?
> I know what You'll say.
> Try ME.
> Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us.     
> What about Ann?
> See? I knew it! I knew You would bring her up! Why, Lord, she's told lies 
> about me, spread stories. She never paid back the money she owes me. I've 
> sworn to get even with her!
> But -- your prayer --What about your prayer?
> I didn't -- mean it.
> Well, at least you're honest. But, it's quite a load carrying around
all that 
> bitterness and resentment isn't it?
> Yes, but I'll feel better as soon as I get even with her. Boy, have I
got some 
> plans for her. She'll wish she had never been born.
> No, you won't feel any better. You'll feel worse. Revenge isn't sweet.
You 
> know how unhappy you are -- Well, I can change that.
> You can? How?
> Forgive Ann. Then, I'll forgive you; And the hate and the sin, will be
Ann's 
> problem -- not yours.  You will have settled the problem as far as you
are 
> concerned.
> Oh, you know, You're right. You always are. And more than I want
revenge, I 
> want to be right with You . .(sigh). All right . all right . I forgive
her.
> There now! Wonderful! How do you feel?
> Hmmmm. Well, not bad. Not bad at all! In fact, I feel pretty great!
You know, 
> I don't think I'll go to bed uptight tonight. I haven't been getting much 
> rest, you know.
> Yeah, I know. But, you're not through with your prayer are you? Go on.
> Oh, all right. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
> Good! Good! I'll do that. Just don't put yourself in a place where you
can be 
> tempted.
> What do You mean by that?
> You know what I mean. 
> Yeah. I know.
> Okay. Go ahead. Finish your prayer.
> For Thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory forever. Amen.
> Do you know what would bring me glory --What would really make me happy?
> No, but I'd like to know. I want to please You now. I've really made a
mess of 
> things. I want to truly follow You. I can see now how great that would
be. 
> So, tell me . . . how do I make You happy?
> YOU just did.
>  
> -- 
> The only bug free software from MickySoft is still shrink-wrapped
> in their warehouse..."
> 
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